Monday, September 14, 2009

Dating In The Metal Scene pt. 1: The Start

Not that I have tons of experience, but I thought I would touch on this topic.

Bottom line is-I've always had a 'thing' for guys in this brand of music. From a young age, I was always attracted to men my peers and sisters deemed as ugly. All my friends liked short cropped hair, polo shirts, and abercrombie or south pole wearing guys. Which was a turn off for me.

I was more attracted to men who looked like they should work at a Renaissance fair or at least be an extra in brave heart. Long hair, sweaty and lean with tons of body hair. (I like hairy men. I know it's strange. I just think it's so masculine...delicious)

It didn't necessarily matter what race the guy was as long as he fit the short list of requirements.

I've always had a fascination for finding beauty in the grotesque. I liked that my friends thought these guys were unkempt and not worthy. I liked the juxtaposition of a long haired man having a feminine quality yet maintaining a masculine edge. (long hair usually a beauty trait resigned for women) It just turned me on-the thought of a guy like that made me tingle between my legs and excited me.

It just so happens that the music I started to fall in love with at a young age usually had something to do with men that fit this desciption. The aggression, the hair flying everywhere, the shirt strewn across the stage revealing a chest soaked in perspiration, hands moving lovingly across the strings of a guitar or bass, and a deep and evil growl that made something inside me quench. When every one's first celebrity crush was Will Smith or Tom Cruise-mine was King Ov Hell from Gorgoroth (pictured above *droolll*) and Mikael Akerfeldt's from Opeth.
Yeah-it's an acquired taste.

Naturally-all this would affect my dating choices. I had to date someone with as much passion for music as I contained and nothing less would satisfy me. But as I reached about 15-I started to wonder if the types of guys I like would in anyway be interested in me. Luckily, I never had a problem finding boys....
(Dating in The Metal Scene pt. 2: Race Issues coming soon...)
Sorry for the lack of postage.


Anonymous said...

Luke says:
Well that's a confidence boost, because I'm a hairy dude myself (not greek people level hairyness though)
but I hate having long hair on my head, so, I can't meet that prerequisite.
I almost never wash my hair, and I find the shorter it is, the less oily and gross it gets.

Anonymous said...

Mikael Akerfeldt is a fukn cool dude by the way, I've seen Opeth 3 times now and I love the way he interacts with the crowd, like he's our best friend or something.

The Black Girl into Heavy Metal said...

@Luke-Lol, I'm not into sasquatch hairy-but chest hair, arm hair, leg hair, the treasure trail (*shiver), and even a little hair along the jaw is nice. Strangely I'm not too much into beards. I like a clean cut face.

Ha, my bf just cut his hair and he is refusing to grow it back, to my disdain (he says the same thing you did) but I'm not so shallow.
And I just saw Opeth in July and it was intense. I was right up front and was totally enthralled by how much stage presence he has.Thanks for the comment.

Raz said...

this is a really interesting blog! i couldn't find any contact details so if you could email me at that would be cool i have a proposal for you. give it a go!


helluvadrug said...

I know exactly where youre coming from; although i must say, my list of requirements is quite long.

I found it easy to focus on bettering myself, when i was never interested in the guys around me.

Ive scoured damn near every race relations-interracial dating forum on the Web trying to get a better idea about how to go about it, and what i found was that the attraction is somewhat mutual, but social stipulations prevent any effort to get the ball rolling.

helluvadrug said...

by the way, two of my favorites have to be Vreth and Skrymer from Finntroll, Skrymer in particular because i have a thing for older guys :]

The Black Girl into Heavy Metal said...

@Helluvadrug-YES! Vreth is super hot! I was torn between putting his or King Ov Hell's pic up there but King won. Skrymer is a total dish too.
Oh, and I agree that the attraction is there-but-as you said, social stipulations prohibit any advancement. I've had an old friend of mine tell me that she thought IR relationships looked weird and that my BF and I look even weirder because of his metal head look.
I'll probably go into that in pt. `2.
Anyways, welcome to the blog!

helluvadrug said...

Thanks! And I'm dying to read part two!

Nonworshipper (TZ Zine) said...

I could only ever date a metalhead. Yeah, I'm biased like that. Hairy, geeky and totally in love with metal (and me, of course!) is my dream. It'd be perfect if he didn't drink or smoke. That's a part of the "metal culture" I could toss right out of the window without regret.
You don't like beards? A long Viking beard is tantalizing for me. Pile the facial hair on!

Yet, dating is out of the picture for now. I'm much too misanthropic about relationships. Plus, guys at my school are all close-minded x-tians who listen to rap and hip-hop and think I'm the devil in Doc Martens.

Anonymous said...

Are you in lastfm?

Dating said...

Dating is out of the picture for now.

LuvRuffians said...

Same! same! same! My Friends like the justin beiner watever his name is kinda guy but not me! If your not a metal head please move. Long dark hair, chest, leg, arm hair, treasure trail LOL! Never heard that before! But I love it! so manly! Tasty... Again thought I was the only one!

Viagra said...

For me the dating issue began with the fact i knew very little (better said None) girls that liked Metal, so i had a open minded opinion in taste, but the goth girls have always been my weakness. My current GF was not into metal at all when I met her, and guess what... Love was stronger than pop culture... she's now a hardcore Metalhead, thank you very much!

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